Comments on: How to Deal with Unruly Kids Part 1 http://powerhouselive.org/2008/11/how-to-deal-with-unruly-kids-part-1/ An inner-city children's ministry of Resurrection Life Church. Wed, 04 May 2011 15:09:20 -0500 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.3 hourly 1 By: jonl http://powerhouselive.org/2008/11/how-to-deal-with-unruly-kids-part-1/comment-page-1/#comment-5691 jonl Wed, 04 May 2011 15:09:20 +0000 http://powerhouse.reslifeblogs.org/?p=99#comment-5691 I'm not a child raising expert by any means, but I think it's something that your 4 year old will eventually grow out of. We are all born with disobedience in our blood. My oldest is now 5. He had some disobedient quirks that would just about drive us crazy. We kept loving him like crazy and disciplining him properly (What we felt was properly.). He eventually grew out of those quirks. The temper tantrums are pretty much non-existent now. He's become the easiest child to deal with. Our middle child is now 3. Now we have a different child with different quirks that we have to work on. I believe in time, she will overcome her disobedient patterns. As parents we just have to keep loving on them and teaching them right from wrong. I’m not a child raising expert by any means, but I think it’s something that your 4 year old will eventually grow out of. We are all born with disobedience in our blood. My oldest is now 5. He had some disobedient quirks that would just about drive us crazy. We kept loving him like crazy and disciplining him properly (What we felt was properly.). He eventually grew out of those quirks. The temper tantrums are pretty much non-existent now. He’s become the easiest child to deal with. Our middle child is now 3. Now we have a different child with different quirks that we have to work on. I believe in time, she will overcome her disobedient patterns. As parents we just have to keep loving on them and teaching them right from wrong.

]]> By: thejensen05@yahoo.com http://powerhouselive.org/2008/11/how-to-deal-with-unruly-kids-part-1/comment-page-1/#comment-4954 thejensen05@yahoo.com Wed, 30 Mar 2011 17:57:25 +0000 http://powerhouse.reslifeblogs.org/?p=99#comment-4954 I have three children, a daughter 9, son 4 and my last son is almost 3. My 4yr old has an aweful time with patience. He regularly interrupts me on the phone, durring conversations, bathing my youngest, teaching school to my oldest or when I'm doing just about anything that doesn't have to do with him. I have spoken to him on several occations explaining that I will listen to him to hear what he wants, but when I have to tell him I will be with him in a minute, not now, he has a temper tantrum slamming doors, throwing toys and stomping around because I didn't come right then. I follow through with my promise to come to him and see what everything is all about or what he needs asap, but there are times I can't and he just isn't excepting. I don't believe that he suffers from the middle child characteristics as I try to make special times for each child throughout the day. I don't know how to get him to see that what he is doing is wrong attitude wise and that patience is something we all have to have now and them, Help! I have three children, a daughter 9, son 4 and my last son is almost 3. My 4yr old has an aweful time with patience. He regularly interrupts me on the phone, durring conversations, bathing my youngest, teaching school to my oldest or when I’m doing just about anything that doesn’t have to do with him. I have spoken to him on several occations explaining that I will listen to him to hear what he wants, but when I have to tell him I will be with him in a minute, not now, he has a temper tantrum slamming doors, throwing toys and stomping around because I didn’t come right then. I follow through with my promise to come to him and see what everything is all about or what he needs asap, but there are times I can’t and he just isn’t excepting. I don’t believe that he suffers from the middle child characteristics as I try to make special times for each child throughout the day. I don’t know how to get him to see that what he is doing is wrong attitude wise and that patience is something we all have to have now and them, Help!

]]> By: jonl http://powerhouselive.org/2008/11/how-to-deal-with-unruly-kids-part-1/comment-page-1/#comment-2809 jonl Thu, 30 Sep 2010 14:06:10 +0000 http://powerhouse.reslifeblogs.org/?p=99#comment-2809 I think that any substitute situation is hard to deal with. Respect in today's society is earned. It shouldn't be that way, but it is. It's a shame that kids aren't being taught at home to respect those who are in authority. With the many fatherless homes in America and homes where the parents are so selfish that they send their kids here and there just to keep them out of their hair instead of spending time to raise them, this is the outcome that we are getting. I think that any substitute situation is hard to deal with. Respect in today’s society is earned. It shouldn’t be that way, but it is. It’s a shame that kids aren’t being taught at home to respect those who are in authority. With the many fatherless homes in America and homes where the parents are so selfish that they send their kids here and there just to keep them out of their hair instead of spending time to raise them, this is the outcome that we are getting.

]]> By: mark http://powerhouselive.org/2008/11/how-to-deal-with-unruly-kids-part-1/comment-page-1/#comment-2801 mark Thu, 30 Sep 2010 01:37:13 +0000 http://powerhouse.reslifeblogs.org/?p=99#comment-2801 Problem is driving kids, when you are substituting for the real driver who is somewhere else. You know none of the kid's names, and they won't even sit down. You can't start the bus until all kids are seated. Then once you've started, the screaming, pushing, shoving and what else, continues. This is what we drivers need guidance for. You can call the principal before the route begins and the kids are dead silent. As soon as she leaves the bus, they just erupt. I'm sick of kids who never got raised properly. Problem is driving kids, when you are substituting for the real driver who is somewhere else. You know none of the kid’s names, and they won’t even sit down. You can’t start the bus until all kids are seated. Then once you’ve started, the screaming, pushing, shoving and what else, continues.

This is what we drivers need guidance for. You can call the principal before the route begins and the kids are dead silent. As soon as she leaves the bus, they just erupt.

I’m sick of kids who never got raised properly.

]]> By: Patty http://powerhouselive.org/2008/11/how-to-deal-with-unruly-kids-part-1/comment-page-1/#comment-1059 Patty Thu, 11 Mar 2010 00:20:15 +0000 http://powerhouse.reslifeblogs.org/?p=99#comment-1059 PS-I said no discussion during the consequence stage. The adult should tell the child calmly what the behavior/rule violation was that brought about the consequence. However, most kids will argue with the adult and that is where the 'no discussion' applies. PS-I said no discussion during the consequence stage. The adult should tell the child calmly what the behavior/rule violation was that brought about the consequence. However, most kids will argue with the adult and that is where the ‘no discussion’ applies.

]]> By: Patty http://powerhouselive.org/2008/11/how-to-deal-with-unruly-kids-part-1/comment-page-1/#comment-1058 Patty Thu, 11 Mar 2010 00:16:08 +0000 http://powerhouse.reslifeblogs.org/?p=99#comment-1058 This is a great discussion. As a veteran public school teacher I have had many opportunities to have behavioral disruptions in my classroom. One of the keys in dealing with the behaviors is consistencey. Having simple rules that the kids and adults understand, with clearly defined consequences and positive reinforcers built in. Then, consistent and immediate consequences must be enforced calmly. No discussion or arguing during the consequence time (such as a 'time out' chair). Whatever the consequence, the child must then apologize and be hugged (if appropriate) and brought back to the group for a fresh start. It is our responsibility to exercise loving authority. This provides a sense of well being to children. I so agree that many parents now think that they are to be their child's friend. I believe that is one of the reasons for the acting out behaviors. This is a great discussion. As a veteran public school teacher I have had many opportunities to have behavioral disruptions in my classroom. One of the keys in dealing with the behaviors is consistencey. Having simple rules that the kids and adults understand, with clearly defined consequences and positive reinforcers built in. Then, consistent and immediate consequences must be enforced calmly. No discussion or arguing during the consequence time (such as a ‘time out’ chair). Whatever the consequence, the child must then apologize and be hugged (if appropriate) and brought back to the group for a fresh start. It is our responsibility to exercise loving authority. This provides a sense of well being to children. I so agree that many parents now think that they are to be their child’s friend. I believe that is one of the reasons for the acting out behaviors.

]]> By: jonl http://powerhouselive.org/2008/11/how-to-deal-with-unruly-kids-part-1/comment-page-1/#comment-1056 jonl Wed, 10 Mar 2010 19:36:47 +0000 http://powerhouse.reslifeblogs.org/?p=99#comment-1056 Hello Patrice, As a teacher, you are in an amazing position. You have the chance to make a huge impact in the life of your students. You have those kids 8 hours a day 5 days a week. You are one of the most influential people in their life. My hat goes off to you. With all that said, I can see how you could get frustrated. Being that I'm not a school teacher, I don't have a ton of advice to give you, but I will share with you a few of my thoughts. I know a retired teacher I'll try to pick her brain on this subject also. But here are my thoughts: A wise woman who used to be a teacher once told me, divide and conquer. I would separate them as much as possible. If you have to face all their desks to the wall. Keep the main trouble makers far away from each other. Secondly, I would do what I could to build relationships with each kid, Relationships = Respect. My 6th grade teacher was the best teacher I ever had in my life. His name was Mr. Frost. Mr. Frost was one of the strictest teachers in the school, but he was also the most loved and respected. He would play cards with the kids during lunch recess. In ministry, building relationships with the kids has seemed to work the best for me. You can also read the part of this post here: http://powerhouselive.org/2008/11/how-to-deal-with-unruly-kids-part-2/ God bless Hello Patrice,

As a teacher, you are in an amazing position. You have the chance to make a huge impact in the life of your students. You have those kids 8 hours a day 5 days a week. You are one of the most influential people in their life. My hat goes off to you.

With all that said, I can see how you could get frustrated. Being that I’m not a school teacher, I don’t have a ton of advice to give you, but I will share with you a few of my thoughts. I know a retired teacher I’ll try to pick her brain on this subject also. But here are my thoughts:

A wise woman who used to be a teacher once told me, divide and conquer. I would separate them as much as possible. If you have to face all their desks to the wall. Keep the main trouble makers far away from each other. Secondly, I would do what I could to build relationships with each kid, Relationships = Respect. My 6th grade teacher was the best teacher I ever had in my life. His name was Mr. Frost. Mr. Frost was one of the strictest teachers in the school, but he was also the most loved and respected. He would play cards with the kids during lunch recess. In ministry, building relationships with the kids has seemed to work the best for me. You can also read the part of this post here:

http://powerhouselive.org/2008/11/how-to-deal-with-unruly-kids-part-2/

God bless

]]> By: Patrice http://powerhouselive.org/2008/11/how-to-deal-with-unruly-kids-part-1/comment-page-1/#comment-1023 Patrice Wed, 03 Mar 2010 15:49:30 +0000 http://powerhouse.reslifeblogs.org/?p=99#comment-1023 Hi, I am a first grade teacher and I deal with an ENTIRE class of unruly children. You tell one to stop doing this, a next one would start doing that. I am at my wits end. I try to be patient but it doesn't help. I can't discipline and my words are just noy getting through to them. What can I do? Please help me! Hi,
I am a first grade teacher and I deal with an ENTIRE class of unruly children. You tell one to stop doing this, a next one would start doing that. I am at my wits end. I try to be patient but it doesn’t help. I can’t discipline and my words are just noy getting through to them. What can I do? Please help me!

]]> By: jonl http://powerhouselive.org/2008/11/how-to-deal-with-unruly-kids-part-1/comment-page-1/#comment-23 jonl Wed, 08 Apr 2009 15:30:07 +0000 http://powerhouse.reslifeblogs.org/?p=99#comment-23 Hello Jen, I don't believe your question could be answered in a blog comment or even a 5 minute conversation. Parenting is hard work even more hard being a parent in a blended family. I would recommend at the minimum getting a good book or two on blended families. Check out these books on Focus on the Family. It's probably best to get the books recommended by Focus on the Family. You can find books on blended families here: http://family.christianbook.com/Christian/Books/easy_find?within=N%3D1112323%26Ne%3D1000000%26Nso%3D1%26action%3DSearch%26event%3DEBRN&Ntk=cbws_keywords&Ntt=blended family&action=Search&N=0&Ne=0&event=ESRCN&nav_search=1&cms=1&Go.x=0&Go.y=0&Go=Go Here are some good articles by Jimmy Evans on blended families: http://www.marriagetoday.org/site/PageServer?pagename=mtrl_family_dynamics_list&sub=blended_families You may even want to go as far as both you and your husband seeing a Christian counselor or a pastor. I hope that helps. Hello Jen,

I don’t believe your question could be answered in a blog comment or even a 5 minute conversation. Parenting is hard work even more hard being a parent in a blended family. I would recommend at the minimum getting a good book or two on blended families. Check out these books on Focus on the Family. It’s probably best to get the books recommended by Focus on the Family. You can find books on blended families here:

http://family.christianbook.com/Christian/Books/easy_find?within=N%3D1112323%26Ne%3D1000000%26Nso%3D1%26action%3DSearch%26event%3DEBRN&Ntk=cbws_keywords&Ntt=blended family&action=Search&N=0&Ne=0&event=ESRCN&nav_search=1&cms=1&Go.x=0&Go.y=0&Go=Go

Here are some good articles by Jimmy Evans on blended families:

http://www.marriagetoday.org/site/PageServer?pagename=mtrl_family_dynamics_list&sub=blended_families

You may even want to go as far as both you and your husband seeing a Christian counselor or a pastor. I hope that helps.

]]> By: Jen D http://powerhouselive.org/2008/11/how-to-deal-with-unruly-kids-part-1/comment-page-1/#comment-22 Jen D Mon, 06 Apr 2009 00:36:10 +0000 http://powerhouse.reslifeblogs.org/?p=99#comment-22 How do I deal with my step children (boys 5 & 7) when their mother tells them they need to be mean and rude to me all the time? I have tried to be fun and do crafts and take them on outings, and still all I get is back talk, hitting, disrespected. I am at my witts end. And I am not allowed to discipline, either. How do I deal with my step children (boys 5 & 7) when their mother tells them they need to be mean and rude to me all the time? I have tried to be fun and do crafts and take them on outings, and still all I get is back talk, hitting, disrespected. I am at my witts end. And I am not allowed to discipline, either.

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